Monday, August 2, 2010

The Daily Dreaded Dinner Run!


Just running into the store for a few things for dinner. This is always my intention. I never think I'm going to walk aimlessly through Wegmans carefree- or should I say list free. Our adventure usually starts out as soon as we leave the house. Yep, for some reason my children don't know how to behave in the car! Shocking isn't it?- but that is for another blog.

You would think choosing a cart would be a simple mindless task- NOPE! Not for us! I refuse to push those cumbersome carts with the filthy plastic car attached to it. I find they are extremely difficult to push not to mention a breeding ground for infections! Eww! I'm positive that none of the very attentive Wegmans employees spend their time disinfecting these carts before and after each and every use. So if I'm lucky there aren't any in site as we are making our cart selection.

90% of the time I end up taking the smaller push cart that isn't big enough to hold an entire order or a child! God gave you legs! Use them! The fun begins when they start arguing over who is going to "help" me push, and which side of the cart they are going to stand on. This usually last only about as far as the produce section because there a whole other world opens up. The concept of looking with your eyes and not with your hands is completely unfathomable to Ellie and Ethan.

Ellie is more of a little helper now- I can usually give her a small job to do that will keep her occupied as long as it doesn't involve anything breakable or easily bruised by dropping a trillion times. That is until Ethan finds out- and that's where the fight starts. Naturally he will insist on doing anything I've asked her to do, that that means I now will have double, and triple the items I had originally needed or wanted.

Just when I think I'm finally making progress- I'm cruising down the aisles. I'm actually putting things we need in the cart. The "Mommy... I want ____ fill in the blank" starts. It could be anything from ANOTHER toothbrush ( since we must have over 100- I should really start buying stock in Colgate) to Tic-Tacs, Mentos, the jumbo economy size box of Popsicles. You name it they need it! Most of the time I don't even look at the request, I know it's either something we already have or something they think they can sneak by when I'm not looking. I suddenly turn into a recorded message of "No's!" At this point I'm the "Ugliest, meanest, most selfish Mommy in the whole world." According to Ethan.

Now God forbid I turn my back for a second and a half...maybe because I have to actually look for something on a shelf? WATCH OUT! I guarantee you all hell breaks loose! Exactly! I don't even need to turn around I heard the crash of the entire content of my shopping cart all over the floor BROKEN! Here it comes. The anger! As if I wasn't already irritated enough now I'm really mad! I can feel the veins in my neck starting to bulge and my face getting hot and red. I scramble to recover anything and everything that isn't totally ruined and put it back in the cart. All I can think about is getting the heck out of the store as fast as I possibly can. I grab them both by their hands and start walking as fast as I can. As we get to the register all I hear over head is "Clean-up in aisle 3."

Sunday, August 1, 2010

"Mommy... Go downstairs!"



I am not a morning person. Never have been and I guarantee I never will be. Some things will just never change. Luckily I have a husband that can feel my pain and always has my coffee ready for me by my bedside when I wake up. Thank God for coffee & husbands that understand!!

I have never been one to make an appointment for anything before noon. Both of the kids went to afternoon preschool and Ellie went to afternoon kindergarten last year. I knew the snobby Moorestown mothers (that all look like Stepford Wives) would look at me and wonder if I owned anything other than sweats. I was always the only Mother at kindergarten drop of without a full face of make-up and pressed clothes. I am dreading Ellie being in first grade next year! I'm starting to prepare myself now!

Ellie is just like me- a little night owl. It takes hours to get her to sleep at night but the extra few hours she sleeps in the morning makes up for it in my book. Ethan on the other hand- will drop like a rock no matter where he is regardless of the time. When he is tired he is tired. But I guess the saying "Early to bed, Early to rise" is true. Ethan will wake up before it's even really light out some mornings. You know that time between 6am and 7am? Where it's just starting to get light outside?

The minute he is awake that's it! He's ready to go! He's up and he expects everyone else to be up with him. At first I hear the "thud" of him climbing out of his bunk-bed and then I know I have to lay as still as I possibly can with my eyes shut tight! It might sound silly to you but I cherish every second of sleep I can get! I feel his little hand touch my arm and he whispers "Mommy, go downstairs." I try not to respond- or if I do it's usually with something to the effect of "it's too early Ethan, come lay down." But that NEVER works and then ALL hell breaks loose! Crying! A crying screaming temper tantrum is what I'm now in store for. What a way to start your day!

After I muster up the energy to sit up and take a few swigs of my usually lukewarm coffee (since Jason so kindly makes if before he leaves for work) I can usually coerce him into my bed with his ITouch (Thank you Apple) for at least another hour. During that hour with one eye open and one eye still shut I try to drown out the combinations of sounds coming from channel three-three, (Noggin) Snood, (a game on the ITouch) and Ethan asking me over a zillion times "Mommy... can we go downstairs?" Some part of me thinks why bother laying in bed I'm never going to get anymore sleep but the other part that's warm and cozy under my blankets understands exactly why.

Welcome To My Life. Enjoy!

Let me welcome you to my life- I hope this blog provides entertainment to you while I use this as an outlet to express all my exciting, frustrating, infuriating and joyful moments as a mother and wife! Please enjoy!

Where do I being...? I am a twenty-seven year old mother of two adorable- terrifying children. Ethan 4 and Ellianna (Ellie) 6. And by terrifying I do mean terrifying! What one doesn't think of the other one does! But all those exciting stories are to come. For now I will stick to introducing our family.

To make a long and very boring and ugly story short- I was married and divorced to my children's father by the time Ethan was a year old. I lived as a single mother with them until I met my current husband Jason. Jason and I haven't been married very long but he jumped in with both feet and has really been my Saving Grace in many ways. He was instantly a Daddy to the kids and a support to me! I am no longer out numbered! Jason and I have joined forces and together we can take on almost anything.

I felt lucky- like I had escaped an earthquake with Ellie. She was (for the most part) a very easy baby, toddler, and now child. Ethan as well was an adorable and loving little boy. We skated by years 1 through 6 with Ellie. She was a breeze. And then the storm hit! A big storm- kind of like a tornado that lifts your house up, spins it around and tosses it down in another county. Ethan turned 4!!

Granted children don't come out holding an owners manual or with instructions stamped on their soft little round butt cheeks- Parenting is a learn as you go experience. At least for me it has been but no one ever warns you about what I loving refer to as the Terrible Fours. I am convinced this is because they are all too busy writing books and creating websites on the Terrible Twos- or maybe it's because only I have been blessed with a child going through this wonderful time. Well, I am here to tell you that the Terrible Twos are a walk in the park on a cool spring afternoon compared to the Terrible Fours!

Let this first post be a preview for what you are in store for! Fasten your seatbealts!!